Good-bye Guilt

I gave birth to Ryan 29 years ago today.  I lost him to suicide over seven years ago. Today, I decided to let go of some of the guilt that I have been carrying around with me.  Not all of it.  But some of it.

Suicide leaves those of us behind left with a whole lot of crap to deal with in so many ways.  I have waded through legal issues, personal belongings and emotional waves of despair.

It is time for me to let go of some things. I feel it inside. Ready. So good-bye to guilt. For today.

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3 thoughts on “Good-bye Guilt

  1. Hi Kathy
    My heart breaks for you! I left my husband in 2003 and he did everything possible to alienate my kids from me, with great success. I had cancer and I just couldn’t do the drinking thing anymore, so I LEFT and got my life and health back. I am still estranged from my children and the guilt I feel for leaving my marriage haunted me for a very long time. I swear I am going to write a book about feeling guilty before I die! My children and I don’t have a relationship but at least they are still alive and well, I will have to be happy with that! I’m easily pleased these days and try VERY HARD to let go of guilt also! Sending you a warm hug and a pat on the back! Just to prove that God has a sense of humor he sent me the most incredible man and renamed me TOUGH!!!
    God Bless
    Rhonda:)

  2. My oldest son is about the same age that Ryan was when you lost him. My eyes well up with tears every time I think of your pain. But I also know that we can’t take responsibility for the choices our kids make, indeed for who they are. We can love, that is all. Good for you for letting go of some of the guilt. That burden must be as terrible as the pain of your loss. I wish you peace.

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