The Sandwich Generation

Squished between children and parents, like a piece of bologna.  This is the term I’ve heard for people who are still raising their children and also have to look after their aging parents.  I’m sort of in there.  My boys are about raised, just have to get through the college years.  My parents are too stubborn to let me raise them.  I just get to worry about everybody.

I’ve talked a little bit before about my mom having dementia.  I think the correct name for her type of dementia is vascular dementia.  There are many different kinds.  With her type, she remains at one level for quite a while and then drops at once, instead of slowing losing her memory. I took her for a walk yesterday with my dog and she walked a long way. We talked about the past because that is what she remembers but we can still talk about life and problems together.

She did not remember that Ryan was dead or how he died. That is a first.  We always talk about him so I naturally mentioned him and she had forgotten.  Maybe that is a good part to this dementia thing. Maybe some day I won’t remember either?

My dad’s mind is in pretty good shape.  He loves to do a certain kind of puzzle and that is what he obsesses over.  I had to order a puzzle solver gizmo from Amazon for him to help him solve this puzzle.  Not just any puzzle will do, it has to be this certain puzzle.   But, his eyes are not good.  He has glaucoma and will eventually go blind.  I will be taking him to the city soon, to see the eye specialist and he will probably have to undergo some type of procedure.  Hopefully it will help his eyesight. And yes, he is still driving.  He’s the slowest driver in town but has to drive the neighbour to Tim Hortons for coffee every morning because the elderly neighbour has lost his license due to his eyesight.  It will be a sad day for my dad when he can’t drive either.

As I see my parents age, I see myself in the future.  If I am lucky enough to live that long. They were two very strong independent people when I was growing up who I admired.  They weren’t perfect but they did their best.  That’s all we can do.

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