I was looking at a picture of an event that happened five years ago. My mom was at that event and I had to hold her hand to get out of the room because there were a lot of people there. That reminded me that she has been living with dementia for a long time. It started at least ten years ago. That is a long time of her life that she has struggled with memory loss, frustrations and fears. I have come to really appreciate all that my father did for her to make her life easier and enjoyable. It was at a cost to him but one he felt was worth it. She was able to stay in her home and continue on in her marriage and he was able to do this too, until he passed away.
She is quite physically fit for her 84 years. She needs a cane now, which she hates and never uses because she can’t remember to use it. Having memory loss prevents her from participating in social events because she feels anxious if people talk to her. She is afraid she will say the wrong thing. Depression and fears prevent her from going outside and getting exercise. But she enjoys going for a car ride now and then and seeing people she recognizes.
She is still in her own home living alone and somehow doing it. How long can this go on? That’s up to the Creator. As she tells me, “when it’s my time to die, I’m going to die no matter what you do.” And really, I believe she’s right. So it is for all of us.