Ten Years

It has been ten years since I last saw you on this earth. Ten years. Ten minutes. It’s all too long and I still miss you. I guess that will never stop until I see you again. Some things have changed. I have managed to go on living this new existence. Your brothers are all doing good and that makes me so happy. You now have Grampa with you over there and that makes me feel better. Grampa’s death healed me a lot because even though I would have liked him to stay longer, his leaving was a more natural one. The way it is supposed to be. Yours was not natural but I can’t change that. I can try to let go of some fears and worry and pray for a natural life for your brothers. Yes, I miss you Ryan, and I will forever.

There was a time

when you were here

and we were a happy family

I know it’s true

ten years it’s been

and the ache is still there

only dulled by the clouds

it’s hidden behind

photos of you, smiling, so cute

hair sticking up every which way

and I know you were real

there was a time

when you were here

twenty-0ne years of life

we shared and more

I knew you before you were born

a lock of your hair

I can still touch, so sweet

and I know there was a time

when you were here

with me

 

ryan 001

 

ryan 025

 

 

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