Week one at the Lodge

It has been a challenging week! I was told it would be, obviously. Mom does not want to be there and wants to go home. We feel Horrible! I wish she could go home. I wish she could live in her own home. I wish she didn’t have dementia.

Her days are up and down and she is slowly adjusting. She finds it hard to sit and eat with strangers and that will get easier in time as people seem more familiar. Because Red Lake is a small community our Lodge has one floor with residents of all different levels of capabilities and health issues. I think that if we lived in a city, she would be on a floor with other residents of similar health levels. But being in a small town has it’s benefits. The staff are great and a lot of them know the residents because they are from the same community.

She says, “What am I doing here? I’m not crazy like these people!”

We have to sneak in mom’s belongings to her room when she is in the dining room so that she doesn’t notice that we are “moving her”. She gets upset if she sees us bringing her things there. She doesn’t want any of her pictures displayed and puts them away. Slowly, we will hang a picture up here and there.  Everything just appears. This weekend, we are going to try to rearrange her furniture and see if that makes her feel more comfortable, but again, we have to move furniture when she is in the dining room.  There are times when she refuses to eat so we have to wait for the right moments.

She has had visits from friends which she loves and she is always happy to see people. She is angry with me. I am the one who “lied and put her in there”. Sometimes I have to leave her because she is getting so upset with me when I am there.

So week one was difficult and we’re into week two with much of the same.  But at least she is eating, bathing and most importantly, she is safe.

 

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4 thoughts on “Week one at the Lodge

  1. Kathy

    First, you are now at the top of our prayer list.

    Everything you are doing is right.
    Kathy, do you hear me? Everything you are doing is right.
    Everything.

    How much love does one person have to give… for how long … and how painful does it have to get! It is so unfair – life is not what we thought it might be … How could we have known it would be this way? Maybe it is better not to know too much of the road laying ahead of each of us – we might have been scared off … and our love ones left without us…

    When tears fall down that little face of yours, be assured of the love of all of us for you. When your heart breaks – again – know that we are with you … and with your beautiful, kind, (and presently demanding) loving mom …

    One final word for now –

    The last time I I spoke with your mom, she kept returning to the same theme “Kathy, she is such a good girl” … and so you are …you are keeping her safe, and fed, and warm.

    June Cheech and Stan

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